Hello, LOve the game the storytelling is so good and each character feels so alive. Currently, I'm on the last chapter with Gareth's inner monologue and was wondering if he is meant to be aromantic since it seems he doesn't care too much about romance.
Really enjoyed the game thus far! Was way more engrossed in the story than I thought I would. Wanted to ask though, do you plan on adding the dragon companion as a romance option? Got really exited towards the end when you could show jealousy about her and Felix, but that got dropped quick. I'm sure my Mordred would appreciate it lol.
Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it! Nope, the dragon friend is not a romantic option. The choice you're referring to wasn't meant as romantic jealousy, but the sort of jealousy that could crop up in a friendship. Granted, it's not handled very well because I do just randomly introduce it in the middle of chapter 5 and then drop it; it's when the idea came to me, and I was sort of testing it out before committing to the route.
I actually had a similar thought while playing the game. I believe that Arthur is Sir Kay's adoptive brother, which would technically make Mordred and Gawain cousins, but they are not biologically related nor were they raised as such.
I mean technically they are cousins, but they weren't raised together, nor do they really consider themselves as such unless you actively choose to later in game.
She was a toddler at most when Merlin made the prophecy and a young child when we last saw her 💀 There wasn't any indication that she knew of Mordred's prophecy (as I'm pretty sure Lot didn't know about the prophecy specifically)
i love this game sm, i keep coming back to it! i wanna kiss galahad pls pretty boy stop hating me already ;-; this is so well written and thought out, that's really cool! i really enjoy how different the story and the relationships play out :3 all my best wishes to the author!♡♡♡
only thing i think about every time i restart the game is that in the beginning merlin says "your son/daughter.. blah-blah will be bad" so if later mordred turns out to be trans and becomes daughter/son (or just kid) instead then technically the prophecy isn't about them anymore... ik the point is in choosing agab but it would be funny if trans mordred could use it against the prophecy lol ("the prophecy says your son will bring the end, Arthur! i'm not your son, i'm your daughter, you said you support me, do you not?? the prophecy isn't about me!!")
I didn't get much sleep last night because of this wonderful novel. I am really invested in Mordred happiness, in Morgana's pursuit of revenge/justice, in my dragon's love life! The only way I'm ready to interact with Arthurian legend is BBC's Merlin and now this game too 😁
I love that Mordred is flexible in sense of moral. That no one here are one-dimensional, everyone is after their own interests. This is refreshing. I will wait as long as needed. Thank you so much.
Not dead! Chapter 5 is just a huge chapter, so only half of it is available to play publicly while the patreon demo has some more content! However, the author has had a litany of bad luck re: their hand injury, so the updates so far have been small so the author doesn't overtax their hands.
As Over the Moon said, BoC is very much active! I've just had ups and downs in my recovery with nerve entrapment and haven't always been able to write much.
Sorry to hear about that, hope it isn't too painful! Make sure to take rebular breaks, and if need be take a long break, your health is more important than the story!
Hey hey! I've been enjoying the game so far, so there's nothing to criticize, but I had a quick question: My Mordred is female, but along the gameplay I've picked a few options that generally speak against the traditional female gender role, such as "I love dresses, but I don't want to be required to wear them".
Then, Morgana responded with something along the lines of "I'll support whatever decision you make", which back then I thought meant the dresses part. But fast forward to chapter four, I pick the Puberty Potion option, which leads me to following options:
"If you mean how I'd like people to refer to me, I don't quite know yet."
"I think I'd like people to start referring to me as he."
"I think I'd like people to start referring to me as they."
So I hope I didn't accidentally make my Mordred become transgender, because I identify as a cisgender female.
Hey, not a dev but from my experience playing this a lot in different ways I dont think it was the clothing choice. The puberty potion is meant to be a way to stop your character from undergoing female development and puberty.
Writer here, come to confirm what others have already helpfully said: it's the puberty potion option, that's specifically there to open up choices for trans/non-binary Mordred. (clothes have nothing to do with it, Mordred can choose to wear whatever, cis or trans).
Absolutely loved this! Went way past my expectations. Wonderful and engaging storytelling. I am so glad that I gave this a try. Truly hope that the story will continue. 20/10 good stuff good stuff.
Oblivious options create/increase romantic attachment between MC and the target person, but one where MC doesn't realize the nature of their fondness, and isn't openly (or at least intentionally) flirting.
Nope, TBOC is still kicking on! she's finishing up chapter 5, but the authors hand has been Not Doing Great, so this chapters progress will be rather slow as she recovers.
Amazing writing, but small twine coding detail: the <<silently>> command could be used to clean up the massive blank spaces left at the bottom of some passages. That way code and hidden choices don't add extra line breaks to the passage and make them super long.
Is it weird that my favorite part is your really well thought out lesson plan? Thank you for being so conscientious about it, it felt so very reasonable and served as a great intro to the lore as we learn alongside our little protagonist!
Just finished reading up to the end of the current demo and overall I really enjoyed it! 😀
To start with, I'll talk about the parts I had some problems with. There were some points during the last two chapters (3 & 4) while Mordred was going about his daily life/lessons when nothing much was happening and it just felt like a bit of an info (lore) dump. I other words, it sort of dragged and I began to lose interest and skimmed. I wanted to be honest about my personal experience here even if it might not be the glowing praise some would give. Skimming is a subconscious reaction for me when my brain stops feeling engaged and searches for the next point of interest in a story. I'm not saying it was that way for other readers, but it was so far me.
I also lost some interest in the dragons, which somehow feel a little too normalised now, even mundane, and my 'fierce' dragon feels quite tame. I feel it's become a bit lax in upholding that sense of wonder that, as bonded as we may be with our dragon, we should still feel from time to time over these powerful creatures. I also feel that, due to being a Pendragon/Dragonblood, our insight and connection with dragons in general, even if we're cautious in not showing it, should still feel more profound then it does. Like we just perceive them on a level that others (besides Arthur) cannot, even if we're not actively engaging them. I still don't really get that vibe from it.
But other than those bits, I found your writing style is very mature and polished. I really love the way you portray Morgana - she genuinely feels as powerful and formidable as she should feel, and I think she is the character you write best. I'm always interested to see what she'll do next and what little (or not-so-little) schemes she's got cooking. Really nice. Our Mordred is also a well written MC - suitably complex. Lastly, I'm enjoying the building yet conflicted relationship between Mordred and Arthur - I'm really intrigued to see the future difficulties the relationship faces as the two grow closer and Arthur becomes even more conflicted between his trust in Merlin's prophecy and his own (potential) desire to recognise Mordred as his successor, and of course the potential public fallout of such a revelation. But I suppose that's all quite far in the future! Most importantly, I felt disappointed when I reached the end of the demo and there was no more for now, which is always a good sign. 😊
I also hope we see more of Galahad soon - my male Mordred's chosen LI. So far the parts with him have been my favourite parts of this story (what can I say? I'm a sucker for the enemies-to-lovers trope). I enjoyed the nature of Mordred's relationship with him during our first meeting, and how by the end Galahad is potentially torn between the desire to believe and follow his father and the realisation that his father is not as perfect or right as he originally imagined, and Mordred may not be this world-ender that he's made to believe. I also like the antagonism between them too, and am interested to see how they'll interact when they're reunited after 5 years - what's changed, and how the attraction blossoms (both advertently and inadvertently) out of what starts out as antagonism. The complexity and changing nature of it is always a fun experience, in my opinion! ❤
I'm also wondering - will it be possible to romance Galahad even if our Mordred doesn't exactly try to befriend him? By that I mean, Mordred might still antagonise Galahad as he does him, but Galahad is observant enough to see how Mordred acts toward people he cares about, and that Mordred may not be quite as "horrible" as all that, not to mention Mordred's teasing flirts (potentially) getting him a bit flustered despite himself. Anyway, it would be interesting to know!
As a #galahad historian whose stalked his tag on the blog relentlessly, you can romance galahad without befriending him! As long as you show some romantic interest in him (whether oblivious or knowingly) and try to change his mind on you being Evil McEvilsteen from the Land of All Evil, a romance can happen!
Thank you for the feedback. You're not the first one to raise such concerns regarding pacing/lore dumping, and I've thought about it all and decided I will be making edits to the chapters in question (as well as other changes I've planned, like introducing Guin earlier). Now, I don't know exactly when I'll get round to doing that - if I'll manage by the next public update - but it's something I've noted and made plans for.
Regarding the dragons, I'm not sure I fully understand what you mean? I'll admit I'm quite unsatisfied with the current dragon friend personalities, and I have the intention to change things - instead of choosing one big trait, which I feel have turned the way I write the dragon friend rather one-dimensional, I'll be adopting a different approach, using "archetypes" in order to go more in depth with the characterization.
And yes, Mordred can romance Galahad while antagonizing him!
Well, according to (very old, so don't shoot me if I'm wrong) tumblr asks, you can flirt with ro's as long as you don't get locked into a 'route' beforehand- so, let's say I have a childhood crush on Nimue, but then flirt with Galahad, BUT I also sometimes flirt with Nimue as well. In game, it would probably translate to the two characters experiencing confusion regarding who I'm interested in, and potentially start a few arguments. (At least, from what I understood from, I'll say this again, very old tumblr asks.)
But what's the build up? What's the punchline? Like, it just seems like a random comment scolding the author for using mature language. If you want random people online to know your joking, frame your joke correctly?
Hi, just fyi, I'm nonbinary, bisexual and english is my second language <3 I was under the impression that this is a reclaimed term and not a slur, sorry :<
gay is used as a slur, queer is, fag is. I will never stop calling myself queer though. it's some faschist message board that convinced young people it's a slur when it was long used perfectly normally as a great umbrella term.
It's been reclaimed, and is used in a VARIETY of studies surrounding the lgbtq+ community. Also, people call themselves queer all the time- what, if you saw someone who identified as queer irl, would you say that they're using a slur? As long as it's not used as an insult, it is NOT a slur in that context, and post like this actively serve to destroy and dilute queer history. Does the word 'gay' not also serve the purpose as a slur, in your reasoning?
so gay means happy, while the q slur means weird and unnatural. your reasoning of "if its not used as an insult its fine" does not hold any weight, would you say the same for the nword? black people reclaimed it and call eachother it all the time, and why'd you give my simple "hey pls don't use a slur" comment so much power? Me asking for lgb people not to be called weird and unnatural is erasing lgb history?
As a gay person, I, personally am very weird and unnatural.
If you don't like using the word to refer to yourself, that's fine. But you shouldn't ask other people not to use it, especially if they're a random stranger on the internet, because they get to choose what they refer to themself as. Unless it's in person and it makes you uncomfortable, but this is something you don't have to engage in.
Queer has literally become one of the most popular descriptors for people who don't consider themselves heteronormative, but don't necessarily identify with any particular label, or just as a descriptor for people in the LGBT+++ community as a whole.
I hyperfocused on this game so bad that I stayed up until 5am like it’s so INTERESTING and I love how you can shape the story but your own individual choices matter. I saw someone ask if there’s a discord and I would like to be apart of that.
A minor suggestion: currently you're using black heart icon to mark explicit romance options, while the oblivious romance icon comes red colored. If you wanted to make things look uniform (i.e. all these heart icons being red) you could replace the black heart icon with this one: ❤️ (U+2764 U+FE0F) A simple search&replace would handle it.
Man, I hope we get to accomplish our mothers' revenge. I would love a scene where after defeating all her enemies, soaking and covered in their blood, we bow to her with the crown in our outstretched hands and say something along the lines of "What was owed will be repaid, this crown only one of the countless victories I will bring before you, Mother, Queen."
I can list every way in which I am wrong. Yet, I find that list to be objectively incorrect in every way. The people of Camelot deserve prosperity, and change is required for that. I believe romancing morgana is the perfect catalyst for that change.
If that happens their kid is basically gonna be Daenerys 2.0, and will burn Camelot (and broader Avalon) to the ground atop their dragon. Thus, Merlin's prophecy would be fulfilled.
Well it depends on the relationship we made the mc to establish with their brother because if we chose the option that the two siblings were close in the childhood then they are close but what about the other end of the relationship that can become negative, and if we choose our mc hate him then that what happens because as we have seen Gareth is capable of anger both silently and openly when he comes and angryly accuses us for Morgana open affection with Accolon in the tournament(due to the option of choosing to hate him) and also gareth is basically the sibling out of the two that can hide they emotions pretty well and we will never know his thought on the relationship we pursue with his fiance if we are in the hate relaionship with him but if we are close to him, then he reveals he is ok with it, what I am trying to say is that Mc whom hates Gareth should not poke the bear that is pondering wether to devour us the snake in an instant or slowly and painfully
my mc in they childhood: yay when I grow up I wanna be like Accolon
my mc now in they teens: Accolon why are you a simp tell me it not so, I understand she is a thick mommy but why did you have to stoop so low for a baddie like her that is for the street
Great story so far! I've only played up until the point were sir Lancelot was minorly poisoned. The part were Morgana says 'Oh tragedy' Reminds me of the whole 'Sorrows. Prayers.' meme
Fantastic Story! It has gotten a grip on my attention that i've found *Very* hard to find release from! I Love how the story seems to balance so well the day-to-day slice of life bits with the more long term happenings. The ROs are all interesting and loveable so far (with perhaps the understandable exception of Nimue, who we only get short interactions with very early on in the story leading to a certain lack of attachment developing towards her)!
The Story itself is incredibly well written and the narrative quite gripping, a very fun and unique take on the Arthurian Mythos. The text feels slightly repetitive in some paragraphs, feeling a tad.... skippable? but that could simply be related to how rapidly and violently i've been ripping through the story.
I also liked the vast amounts of customization you allowed towards the character of Mordred and how progressive you made the setting. Very nice to see :)
I have encountered a bug near the ending of the current content, when Mordred is confronting their dragon partner about their crush on Elaine's
"Not yet, so shhhhh!" $Dragon_name presses their tail against their snoot, eyes darting in the direction Felix went off. "I just-I'm not sure how to tell them. What if they don't feel the same way? I mean, you've seen them. They're amazing."
All in all i have only praises to sing for this work so far! i'll await further updates eagerly and would most certainly be joining your patreon if i wasn't poor as dirt!
Hello! I love your story! Hope this isn't a stupid question, but how do I get access to the full novel instead of demo? I'm new to this website and don't know how to work patreon either. Or is it not complete yet?
Hi and thank you! It's still a work in progress. The Patreon version is ahead of the public demo, though currently not by a lot, just the arrival of the wedding guests in chapter 5.
Umm,hey firstly let me just say that the storyline and everything..the dilouges and queer representation is exquisitely done,although i was wondering if this is a solo work of yours and if that's the case it would make sense it's taking its time to match the perfection of its previous chapters nonless i don't know if i should say this as it's kinda of an unmasked advice but maybe considering you are working on two stories separately as per what your petron says,you should get a ghost writer or ask someone to be a ghost writer for you..it will make it much more easier to tackle workload and also serve perfection to all of us who are patiently a bit too patiently are awaiting the public release of the next chapter? ✨ Also Secondly,hypthecially when the whole storyline is finished..will the full version be released for free or will it have to be purchased, I hope that's not direct but this is a masterpiece and I just wanna have it on my bucket list before hand soo I can get it just in case.
It's my bad for not updating my various profiles but while my other game, SINY, is not abandoned, neither is it an active project right now. BoC is my main focus and priority, and it's taken me so much to update lately because of health issues I'm still treating. And no, I have no interest in having a ghost writer (if that would even be feasible). I quite enjoy the whole process of writing itself, you know?
The full version of BoC will be available for purchase, though I have no idea of the price as of right now.
Umm hey,firstly thanks for responding and besdies that I really hope that you get better and also feel better in regards to your current health issues,besdies that i appreciate you clarifying everything and whenever the full version is out do know i am getting it no matter what,truly it's a masterpiece deserving to be experienced by everyone,I swear if this masterpiece gets underrated i will kms because the writing and everything it's chefs kiss spectular and this is not just me buttering you up or using empty flattery it truly is and i have not been this excited for a some time..UwU get well soon again and keep slaying and do take care of yourself to not let yours get overworked as i know it can feel pressuring when somthing is soo adored and while it is just don't overwork yourself,take your time caring for yourself and to get it perfection and we all will be waiting patiently being here whenever the next part is out!! Good luck and thanks for granting us the honour of playing this masterpiece..i for one am really excited to meet merlin and spit on his face fr like I wanna choke that old hag of a men to death for all he done to poor modrid,j don't feel as much as hostile to Arthur in comparison to merlin..like i don't wanna hurt Arthur too much just a bit emotionally to make him feel the hurt modrid felt but I wanna torture merlin in every way possible if that makes sense lol..that certainly sounds villionus now
Umm hey,firstly thanks for responding and besdies that I really hope that you get better and also feel better in regards to your current health issues,besdies that i appreciate you clarifying everything and whenever the full version is out do know i am getting it no matter what,truly it's a masterpiece deserving to be experienced by everyone,I swear if this masterpiece gets underrated i will kms because the writing and everything it's chefs kiss spectular and this is not just me buttering you up or using empty flattery it truly is and i have not been this excited for a some time..UwU get well soon again and keep slaying and do take care of yourself to not let yours get overworked as i know it can feel pressuring when somthing is soo adored and while it is just don't overwork yourself,take your time caring for yourself and to get it perfection and we all will be waiting patiently being here whenever the next part is out!! Good luck and thanks for granting us the honour of playing this masterpiece..i for one am really excited to meet merlin and spit on his face fr like I wanna choke that old hag of a men to death for all he done to poor modrid,j don't feel as much as hostile to Arthur in comparison to merlin..like i don't wanna hurt Arthur too much just a bit emotionally to make him feel the hurt modrid felt but I wanna torture merlin in every way possible if that makes sense lol..that certainly sounds villionus now
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I'm absolutely in love with this!!! One playthrough and I'm utterly invested in the story. You're genuinely an amazing writer. Can't wait for more!!!
I've gotta take Gareth's place in the wedding. I need it! GAHHHH
Hello, LOve the game the storytelling is so good and each character feels so alive. Currently, I'm on the last chapter with Gareth's inner monologue and was wondering if he is meant to be aromantic since it seems he doesn't care too much about romance.
OMG, I've continued reading and have confirmed he's a AA battery :3, thank you for this lovable character
Really enjoyed the game thus far! Was way more engrossed in the story than I thought I would. Wanted to ask though, do you plan on adding the dragon companion as a romance option? Got really exited towards the end when you could show jealousy about her and Felix, but that got dropped quick. I'm sure my Mordred would appreciate it lol.
Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it! Nope, the dragon friend is not a romantic option. The choice you're referring to wasn't meant as romantic jealousy, but the sort of jealousy that could crop up in a friendship. Granted, it's not handled very well because I do just randomly introduce it in the middle of chapter 5 and then drop it; it's when the idea came to me, and I was sort of testing it out before committing to the route.
HMMMMMM WHY DOE THIS REMINDS OF.... four knights of the apocalypse
Bruh i made my MC, Gay.
I'm kinda new in the IFs games but i wanted to ask is Four knights of the apocalypse, IF?
Is this still in progress?
Yep! (I've just been dealing with some health issues and haven't always been able to write so much)
get well soon!!!!!
Feel better soon!
I actually had a similar thought while playing the game. I believe that Arthur is Sir Kay's adoptive brother, which would technically make Mordred and Gawain cousins, but they are not biologically related nor were they raised as such.
I mean technically they are cousins, but they weren't raised together, nor do they really consider themselves as such unless you actively choose to later in game.
I feel some animosity towards Merlin here. Cant be sure though.
I don't blame you at all. My mc would stab merlin a thousand times if they could lol
YESS PLEASE LET US STAB MELIN AUTHOR 🥺🥺🥺
what did his daughter do, exactly?
She was a toddler at most when Merlin made the prophecy and a young child when we last saw her 💀 There wasn't any indication that she knew of Mordred's prophecy (as I'm pretty sure Lot didn't know about the prophecy specifically)
Even if this is true, I'm not sure this is a torture worthy offense? Like bold and controversial opinion here, but torture bad.
i love this game sm, i keep coming back to it! i wanna kiss galahad pls pretty boy stop hating me already ;-; this is so well written and thought out, that's really cool! i really enjoy how different the story and the relationships play out :3 all my best wishes to the author!♡♡♡
only thing i think about every time i restart the game is that in the beginning merlin says "your son/daughter.. blah-blah will be bad" so if later mordred turns out to be trans and becomes daughter/son (or just kid) instead then technically the prophecy isn't about them anymore... ik the point is in choosing agab but it would be funny if trans mordred could use it against the prophecy lol ("the prophecy says your son will bring the end, Arthur! i'm not your son, i'm your daughter, you said you support me, do you not?? the prophecy isn't about me!!")
I didn't get much sleep last night because of this wonderful novel. I am really invested in Mordred happiness, in Morgana's pursuit of revenge/justice, in my dragon's love life! The only way I'm ready to interact with Arthurian legend is BBC's Merlin and now this game too 😁
I love that Mordred is flexible in sense of moral. That no one here are one-dimensional, everyone is after their own interests. This is refreshing. I will wait as long as needed. Thank you so much.
Not dead! Chapter 5 is just a huge chapter, so only half of it is available to play publicly while the patreon demo has some more content! However, the author has had a litany of bad luck re: their hand injury, so the updates so far have been small so the author doesn't overtax their hands.
As Over the Moon said, BoC is very much active! I've just had ups and downs in my recovery with nerve entrapment and haven't always been able to write much.
Sorry to hear about that, hope it isn't too painful! Make sure to take rebular breaks, and if need be take a long break, your health is more important than the story!
Get well soon and know that you can't rush perfection
Hey hey!
I've been enjoying the game so far, so there's nothing to criticize, but I had a quick question: My Mordred is female, but along the gameplay I've picked a few options that generally speak against the traditional female gender role, such as "I love dresses, but I don't want to be required to wear them".
Then, Morgana responded with something along the lines of "I'll support whatever decision you make", which back then I thought meant the dresses part. But fast forward to chapter four, I pick the Puberty Potion option, which leads me to following options:
"If you mean how I'd like people to refer to me, I don't quite know yet."
"I think I'd like people to start referring to me as he."
"I think I'd like people to start referring to me as they."
So I hope I didn't accidentally make my Mordred become transgender, because I identify as a cisgender female.
Hey, not a dev but from my experience playing this a lot in different ways I dont think it was the clothing choice. The puberty potion is meant to be a way to stop your character from undergoing female development and puberty.
Yeah, the puberty potion is basically the trigger for being able to have your Mordred be non-binary/trans. The clothing has nothing to do with that.
Writer here, come to confirm what others have already helpfully said: it's the puberty potion option, that's specifically there to open up choices for trans/non-binary Mordred. (clothes have nothing to do with it, Mordred can choose to wear whatever, cis or trans).
Oh, alright! I thought it was meant to speed up the puberty to develop sooner, lol. Thanks for clarifying, everyone :))
Absolutely loved this! Went way past my expectations. Wonderful and engaging storytelling. I am so glad that I gave this a try. Truly hope that the story will continue. 20/10 good stuff good stuff.
So I'm a bit confused on this but what exactly does it mean by oblivious romance?????
Oblivious options create/increase romantic attachment between MC and the target person, but one where MC doesn't realize the nature of their fondness, and isn't openly (or at least intentionally) flirting.
Oh that makes sense thank you for answering my question. :)
PLEASE DON'T LET THIS BE DEAD!!!!! IT'S SO GOOD!!!
It isnt😁 shes also got another WIP in progress though, so it might take a while
Nope, TBOC is still kicking on! she's finishing up chapter 5, but the authors hand has been Not Doing Great, so this chapters progress will be rather slow as she recovers.
Amazing writing, but small twine coding detail: the <<silently>> command could be used to clean up the massive blank spaces left at the bottom of some passages. That way code and hidden choices don't add extra line breaks to the passage and make them super long.
thank you for the tip! I'll edit all those instances at some point, i know they don't look great with the gaps 😅
by far the best interactive fiction I've read, and I've read quite a few!!! I loved all the characters and AHHH the worldbuilding! Im so far hooked!!!
Is it weird that my favorite part is your really well thought out lesson plan? Thank you for being so conscientious about it, it felt so very reasonable and served as a great intro to the lore as we learn alongside our little protagonist!
I'm so glad you enjoyed those :)
Discord server link!
Just finished reading up to the end of the current demo and overall I really enjoyed it! 😀
To start with, I'll talk about the parts I had some problems with. There were some points during the last two chapters (3 & 4) while Mordred was going about his daily life/lessons when nothing much was happening and it just felt like a bit of an info (lore) dump. I other words, it sort of dragged and I began to lose interest and skimmed. I wanted to be honest about my personal experience here even if it might not be the glowing praise some would give. Skimming is a subconscious reaction for me when my brain stops feeling engaged and searches for the next point of interest in a story. I'm not saying it was that way for other readers, but it was so far me.
I also lost some interest in the dragons, which somehow feel a little too normalised now, even mundane, and my 'fierce' dragon feels quite tame. I feel it's become a bit lax in upholding that sense of wonder that, as bonded as we may be with our dragon, we should still feel from time to time over these powerful creatures. I also feel that, due to being a Pendragon/Dragonblood, our insight and connection with dragons in general, even if we're cautious in not showing it, should still feel more profound then it does. Like we just perceive them on a level that others (besides Arthur) cannot, even if we're not actively engaging them. I still don't really get that vibe from it.
But other than those bits, I found your writing style is very mature and polished. I really love the way you portray Morgana - she genuinely feels as powerful and formidable as she should feel, and I think she is the character you write best. I'm always interested to see what she'll do next and what little (or not-so-little) schemes she's got cooking. Really nice. Our Mordred is also a well written MC - suitably complex. Lastly, I'm enjoying the building yet conflicted relationship between Mordred and Arthur - I'm really intrigued to see the future difficulties the relationship faces as the two grow closer and Arthur becomes even more conflicted between his trust in Merlin's prophecy and his own (potential) desire to recognise Mordred as his successor, and of course the potential public fallout of such a revelation. But I suppose that's all quite far in the future!
Most importantly, I felt disappointed when I reached the end of the demo and there was no more for now, which is always a good sign. 😊
I also hope we see more of Galahad soon - my male Mordred's chosen LI. So far the parts with him have been my favourite parts of this story (what can I say? I'm a sucker for the enemies-to-lovers trope). I enjoyed the nature of Mordred's relationship with him during our first meeting, and how by the end Galahad is potentially torn between the desire to believe and follow his father and the realisation that his father is not as perfect or right as he originally imagined, and Mordred may not be this world-ender that he's made to believe. I also like the antagonism between them too, and am interested to see how they'll interact when they're reunited after 5 years - what's changed, and how the attraction blossoms (both advertently and inadvertently) out of what starts out as antagonism. The complexity and changing nature of it is always a fun experience, in my opinion! ❤
I'm also wondering - will it be possible to romance Galahad even if our Mordred doesn't exactly try to befriend him? By that I mean, Mordred might still antagonise Galahad as he does him, but Galahad is observant enough to see how Mordred acts toward people he cares about, and that Mordred may not be quite as "horrible" as all that, not to mention Mordred's teasing flirts (potentially) getting him a bit flustered despite himself. Anyway, it would be interesting to know!
As a #galahad historian whose stalked his tag on the blog relentlessly, you can romance galahad without befriending him! As long as you show some romantic interest in him (whether oblivious or knowingly) and try to change his mind on you being Evil McEvilsteen from the Land of All Evil, a romance can happen!
Nice, thanks!
Thank you for the feedback. You're not the first one to raise such concerns regarding pacing/lore dumping, and I've thought about it all and decided I will be making edits to the chapters in question (as well as other changes I've planned, like introducing Guin earlier). Now, I don't know exactly when I'll get round to doing that - if I'll manage by the next public update - but it's something I've noted and made plans for.
Regarding the dragons, I'm not sure I fully understand what you mean? I'll admit I'm quite unsatisfied with the current dragon friend personalities, and I have the intention to change things - instead of choosing one big trait, which I feel have turned the way I write the dragon friend rather one-dimensional, I'll be adopting a different approach, using "archetypes" in order to go more in depth with the characterization.
And yes, Mordred can romance Galahad while antagonizing him!
Again, thank you so much for the feedback! ❤
If I understood correctly there will be no poly routes, right?
Unless all character can be romanced at once, and we woukd have to deal with consequences such as they would be.
Well, according to (very old, so don't shoot me if I'm wrong) tumblr asks, you can flirt with ro's as long as you don't get locked into a 'route' beforehand- so, let's say I have a childhood crush on Nimue, but then flirt with Galahad, BUT I also sometimes flirt with Nimue as well. In game, it would probably translate to the two characters experiencing confusion regarding who I'm interested in, and potentially start a few arguments. (At least, from what I understood from, I'll say this again, very old tumblr asks.)
Ah, understandable.
Thank you for the information.
language! >:(
It warns of 'mature language' at the beginning of the story. What are you complaining about?
welcome to the concept of "jokes" and "irony"
Hilarious!
But what's the build up? What's the punchline? Like, it just seems like a random comment scolding the author for using mature language. If you want random people online to know your joking, frame your joke correctly?
i think the angry emoticon shows that it's satire. also not all jokes have to follow the traditional "buildup to punchline" yk,
bros. my guys. i saw the word bastard. i am trying to be funny
My Mordred is very, obviously queer (being both nb amab and attracted to males), so in my head there was this conversation with this one bully girl:
Bully: Your gay.
Mordred: *hugs Gawain* Yes, that's my gay. Go find your own. And it's "you're".
Btw, this is great story, I love how the characters are portrayed, how Mordred's gender feels are handled and how immersed I got.
I hate writing comments, but for such amazing story, I'm willing to go out of my comfort zone <3
amazing lol, but pls dont use the q slur <<33
Hi, just fyi, I'm nonbinary, bisexual and english is my second language <3 I was under the impression that this is a reclaimed term and not a slur, sorry :<
It;s reclaimed, the person above just has no idea what they're talking about.
some people like to say they've reclaimed it, but the majority of lgb people think its a slur.
yeah, its a slur. its a reclaimed slur. you don't have any right to tell people they can't call themselves queer.
gay is used as a slur, queer is, fag is. I will never stop calling myself queer though. it's some faschist message board that convinced young people it's a slur when it was long used perfectly normally as a great umbrella term.
be offended by the persecution, instead.
You have the right to ask people not to call you queer. You don't have the right to tell someone they can't call THEMSELVES queer.
It's been reclaimed, and is used in a VARIETY of studies surrounding the lgbtq+ community. Also, people call themselves queer all the time- what, if you saw someone who identified as queer irl, would you say that they're using a slur? As long as it's not used as an insult, it is NOT a slur in that context, and post like this actively serve to destroy and dilute queer history. Does the word 'gay' not also serve the purpose as a slur, in your reasoning?
so gay means happy, while the q slur means weird and unnatural. your reasoning of "if its not used as an insult its fine" does not hold any weight, would you say the same for the nword? black people reclaimed it and call eachother it all the time, and why'd you give my simple "hey pls don't use a slur" comment so much power? Me asking for lgb people not to be called weird and unnatural is erasing lgb history?
As a gay person, I, personally am very weird and unnatural.
If you don't like using the word to refer to yourself, that's fine. But you shouldn't ask other people not to use it, especially if they're a random stranger on the internet, because they get to choose what they refer to themself as. Unless it's in person and it makes you uncomfortable, but this is something you don't have to engage in.
you don't talk for gay people. only yourself. who is using it as an insult other than you?
I noticed you’re purposely removing the T in LGBT.. why is that. The only people I know who do that are bigoted and transphobic.
Policing the word queer is pretty common TERF rhetoric, so like, unsurprising.
Unless you were hinting at that, then this is me being bad at subtly...
TERF spotted. Opinion discarded in the trash where it belongs.
People love to pull the race card into literally any discussion no matter how unrelated, I swear.
IT IS NOT THE "GOTCHA" JOKER CARD YOU WANT IT TO BE, PEOPLE
Queer has literally become one of the most popular descriptors for people who don't consider themselves heteronormative, but don't necessarily identify with any particular label, or just as a descriptor for people in the LGBT+++ community as a whole.
I hyperfocused on this game so bad that I stayed up until 5am like it’s so INTERESTING and I love how you can shape the story but your own individual choices matter. I saw someone ask if there’s a discord and I would like to be apart of that.
This is one of my favorite games on itch.io, keep up the great work!
A minor suggestion: currently you're using black heart icon to mark explicit romance options, while the oblivious romance icon comes red colored. If you wanted to make things look uniform (i.e. all these heart icons being red) you could replace the black heart icon with this one: ❤️ (U+2764 U+FE0F) A simple search&replace would handle it.
Me making fate series mordred in this game, best decision ever because it actually goes with the story so well.
when I get my bank working istg I'm subbing to the patreon I crave more media of this series!!!!! I Crave ittttttt
Man, I hope we get to accomplish our mothers' revenge. I would love a scene where after defeating all her enemies, soaking and covered in their blood, we bow to her with the crown in our outstretched hands and say something along the lines of "What was owed will be repaid, this crown only one of the countless victories I will bring before you, Mother, Queen."
I now understand arthur and I feel like a asshole now, I will go cry now.
PLSSSS LET US ROMANCE MORGANA. I CAN FIX HER!!!
Look at what she did to our father. Respectfully, this is the only way to redeem her. It has to be done for the greater good.
i cant even list every way in which you are wrong
I can list every way in which I am wrong. Yet, I find that list to be objectively incorrect in every way. The people of Camelot deserve prosperity, and change is required for that. I believe romancing morgana is the perfect catalyst for that change.
If that happens their kid is basically gonna be Daenerys 2.0, and will burn Camelot (and broader Avalon) to the ground atop their dragon.
Thus, Merlin's prophecy would be fulfilled.
Jocasta Syndrome
Morgana is stronger than you. good luck surviving adoptive dad, too. there might be opinions.
xD
bro thats our mum wtf
When I read this I was like Wtf!? But then I saw the user name ...now it make more sense
HUHHH?????
OMG dude……best matches to your name……
damn i really am cucking my brother, one of the few people that supported me during my whole life. maybe i am a bastard
it's only a problem if he minds...which he very obviously doesn't in game so. take what you will.
yeah, i was just at the beginning at the chapter 5 when i commented and thought he would mind since he didn't fight his dad decision
Oh lol, I got you. Though if my dad was Lot, I probably wouldn't argue with his decrepit ass. Probably wouldn't have changed anything ngl.
Well it depends on the relationship we made the mc to establish with their brother because if we chose the option that the two siblings were close in the childhood then they are close but what about the other end of the relationship that can become negative, and if we choose our mc hate him then that what happens because as we have seen Gareth is capable of anger both silently and openly when he comes and angryly accuses us for Morgana open affection with Accolon in the tournament(due to the option of choosing to hate him) and also gareth is basically the sibling out of the two that can hide they emotions pretty well and we will never know his thought on the relationship we pursue with his fiance if we are in the hate relaionship with him but if we are close to him, then he reveals he is ok with it, what I am trying to say is that Mc whom hates Gareth should not poke the bear that is pondering wether to devour us the snake in an instant or slowly and painfully
PH MY GODDDDD
I love it so much!!! It's amazing, can't wait for more!
my mc in they childhood: yay when I grow up I wanna be like Accolon
my mc now in they teens: Accolon why are you a simp tell me it not so, I understand she is a thick mommy but why did you have to stoop so low for a baddie like her that is for the street
This was actually amazing, ive never been so invested in anything before (please continue this and dont die 😔🙏)
😂😂😂 i love your content, please dont die
I LOVE THIS GAME SO MUCH, this was such a long demo. It was so entertaining !
*Spoilers maybe*
Great story so far! I've only played up until the point were sir Lancelot was minorly poisoned. The part were Morgana says 'Oh tragedy' Reminds me of the whole 'Sorrows. Prayers.' meme
“O’sorrow. You see, I have ended, by respecting you, because I am certain you will never leave me”
Hello There!
Fantastic Story! It has gotten a grip on my attention that i've found *Very* hard to find release from! I Love how the story seems to balance so well the day-to-day slice of life bits with the more long term happenings. The ROs are all interesting and loveable so far (with perhaps the understandable exception of Nimue, who we only get short interactions with very early on in the story leading to a certain lack of attachment developing towards her)!
The Story itself is incredibly well written and the narrative quite gripping, a very fun and unique take on the Arthurian Mythos. The text feels slightly repetitive in some paragraphs, feeling a tad.... skippable? but that could simply be related to how rapidly and violently i've been ripping through the story.
I also liked the vast amounts of customization you allowed towards the character of Mordred and how progressive you made the setting. Very nice to see :)
I have encountered a bug near the ending of the current content, when Mordred is confronting their dragon partner about their crush on Elaine's
"Not yet, so shhhhh!" $Dragon_name presses their tail against their snoot, eyes darting in the direction Felix went off. "I just-I'm not sure how to tell them. What if they don't feel the same way? I mean, you've seen them. They're amazing."
All in all i have only praises to sing for this work so far! i'll await further updates eagerly and would most certainly be joining your patreon if i wasn't poor as dirt!
Thank you! ❤ And will have that bug handled.
Hello! I love your story! Hope this isn't a stupid question, but how do I get access to the full novel instead of demo? I'm new to this website and don't know how to work patreon either. Or is it not complete yet?
Hi and thank you! It's still a work in progress. The Patreon version is ahead of the public demo, though currently not by a lot, just the arrival of the wedding guests in chapter 5.
Is there a time estimate on the next update?
Not yet! What I can tell you is that the next public update will be the second half of chapter 5.
Umm,hey firstly let me just say that the storyline and everything..the dilouges and queer representation is exquisitely done,although i was wondering if this is a solo work of yours and if that's the case it would make sense it's taking its time to match the perfection of its previous chapters nonless i don't know if i should say this as it's kinda of an unmasked advice but maybe considering you are working on two stories separately as per what your petron says,you should get a ghost writer or ask someone to be a ghost writer for you..it will make it much more easier to tackle workload and also serve perfection to all of us who are patiently a bit too patiently are awaiting the public release of the next chapter? ✨ Also Secondly,hypthecially when the whole storyline is finished..will the full version be released for free or will it have to be purchased, I hope that's not direct but this is a masterpiece and I just wanna have it on my bucket list before hand soo I can get it just in case.
It's my bad for not updating my various profiles but while my other game, SINY, is not abandoned, neither is it an active project right now. BoC is my main focus and priority, and it's taken me so much to update lately because of health issues I'm still treating. And no, I have no interest in having a ghost writer (if that would even be feasible). I quite enjoy the whole process of writing itself, you know?
The full version of BoC will be available for purchase, though I have no idea of the price as of right now.
Umm hey,firstly thanks for responding and besdies that I really hope that you get better and also feel better in regards to your current health issues,besdies that i appreciate you clarifying everything and whenever the full version is out do know i am getting it no matter what,truly it's a masterpiece deserving to be experienced by everyone,I swear if this masterpiece gets underrated i will kms because the writing and everything it's chefs kiss spectular and this is not just me buttering you up or using empty flattery it truly is and i have not been this excited for a some time..UwU get well soon again and keep slaying and do take care of yourself to not let yours get overworked as i know it can feel pressuring when somthing is soo adored and while it is just don't overwork yourself,take your time caring for yourself and to get it perfection and we all will be waiting patiently being here whenever the next part is out!! Good luck and thanks for granting us the honour of playing this masterpiece..i for one am really excited to meet merlin and spit on his face fr like I wanna choke that old hag of a men to death for all he done to poor modrid,j don't feel as much as hostile to Arthur in comparison to merlin..like i don't wanna hurt Arthur too much just a bit emotionally to make him feel the hurt modrid felt but I wanna torture merlin in every way possible if that makes sense lol..that certainly sounds villionus now
Umm hey,firstly thanks for responding and besdies that I really hope that you get better and also feel better in regards to your current health issues,besdies that i appreciate you clarifying everything and whenever the full version is out do know i am getting it no matter what,truly it's a masterpiece deserving to be experienced by everyone,I swear if this masterpiece gets underrated i will kms because the writing and everything it's chefs kiss spectular and this is not just me buttering you up or using empty flattery it truly is and i have not been this excited for a some time..UwU get well soon again and keep slaying and do take care of yourself to not let yours get overworked as i know it can feel pressuring when somthing is soo adored and while it is just don't overwork yourself,take your time caring for yourself and to get it perfection and we all will be waiting patiently being here whenever the next part is out!! Good luck and thanks for granting us the honour of playing this masterpiece..i for one am really excited to meet merlin and spit on his face fr like I wanna choke that old hag of a men to death for all he done to poor modrid,j don't feel as much as hostile to Arthur in comparison to merlin..like i don't wanna hurt Arthur too much just a bit emotionally to make him feel the hurt modrid felt but I wanna torture merlin in every way possible if that makes sense lol..that certainly sounds villionus now